Elegante Solitude

Aloneness is forced, solitude is a choice. Loneliness forces me unwillingly to be with myself. But solitude, as the great Montaigne said, gives me a chance to know how to belong to myself. A mental stand - and an entire outlook changes.

 

But, of course, it is not so simple!

 

Ironically in our worlds, we have to forcefully claim our aloneness, often to fight for it. It is antithetical, nay, antisocial, to voluntarily eschew company, and be alone. In its own way, it's a rejection of social norms, company, to say that 'hey I prefer myself to you.' We are all meant to be social animals, and nothing should deviate from that. If you seek droplets of solitude - that is acceptable. We need 'me-time'. That's hip. It's new age, recommended.

 

But to deliberately and pointedly eschew company - to travel alone, to go to a film on one's own, to decline an invitation to a party for no reason whatsoever - is anathema, non-understandable, hence, well, 'unacceptable'!

 

Because nobody can understand solitude. 

 

How can I explain its texture, its ability to embrace like a warm comforting room, to give the feeling of teetering on the edge and of being held at the same time, of getting the feeling of being with a stranger you know well, of discovering the undefinable in the person who's definition you thought you had down pat, of having the full force of freedom with oneself and of pulling oneself back all the time, of being excited because you've just said yes to something which all company would have abhorred.

 

And one discovers what the great Soraya once said - "Sometimes being surrounded by everyone is the loneliest, because you’ll realize you have no one to turn to.”

 

If you liked this poem, consider listening to these other poems on the loneliness - 

• Sometimes We Remember So Hard
• I Can Sense Her Loneliness
• The Art of the Lonely Good Deed

Follow me on Instagram at @sunilgivesup.

Get in touch with me on uncutpoetrynow@gmail.com

 

The details of the music used in this episode are as follows -

Time Is Now by Sascha Ende

Colossus by Sascha Ende

Link: https://filmmusic.io/en/song/Time-Is-Now

Link: https://filmmusic.io/en/song/Colossus

Licence:  https://filmmusic.io/standard-license